Turns out, most men fear writing that first message, so you’re not alone. And it’s more or less the same with online dating. It’s best to keep it short (but not too short – 100 characters is a good rule of thumb) and sweet.
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Keep It Short & Simple
Throwing in a cool fact about her dog’s breed will make you seem like a knowledgeable man. Sure you want to be the source of oxytocin generation but before you can get TrueView app there you’ll have to woo her. The best way to do this is by first woofing her up with comments about her beloved pooch. Talking about her passion is never a bad call.
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This will give them an opportunity to talk about their experience. It will also show them that you’re interested in getting to know who they are as a person instead of just being interested in their appearance. While this advice holds true for both sexes, it is mostly directed at men, considering they are more likely to mention looks in the first contact. In fact, 31% of men compliment women’s appearances. Of those, 51% sent a general message like “you’re hot” and only 22% of them sent something specific like complimenting their eyes or their smile. You’ll want your first impression to do just that—make an impression.
Correctly written but otherwise everyday words such as “don’t” and “won’t” have nicely above average response rates of 36% and 37%. Try talking about particular things that interest you or details that you might have in common with your message receiver. Although, as we all know, people normally enjoy compliments, they’re not as big on pick-up lines. This especially holds true in situations when you have not met in person. Pick-up lines are usually seen as cheesy and impersonal.
When you don’t hesitate, the women believe you are the same in relationships and don’t even want to spend more time on them. The worst that can happen is to be like those thousands of ordinary men who do not give a damn about what women feel. You don’t need to be on it for years. It is not necessary to write absolutely to every woman.
Your only goal in the first message is to assure her that you’re a normal guy. You accomplish this by creating a fun, enjoyable atmosphere that gets her excited to reply. Do not post bogus information on dating websites. Never lie about anything in your profile, whether it’s your age or physical characteristics like height. When you meet your date, they will soon catch on to your lie. Your profile headline is one of the first things women notice on a dating site.
“I just got back from a life-changing two-week scuba retreat in Belize. Fourteen days of diving in crystal clear waters having adventures in the local countryside. I’d love to hear about any interesting or exciting adventures you’ve had.” When you can strike that balance, you’re going to get more engaged responses while also spending less time. What we’re looking for here is a good balance between a canned response and completely unique messages each time (too time-consuming).
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However, relying on statistics is not helpful or effective. Sure, statistically nothing happens for most guys. A tougher but more rewarding solution is making yourself/ your profile / your messages more interesting and more compelling and the results will come.
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Sending too many texts without a reply might make you sound over-eager. If you send your crush a message, wait for her response before you message her again. She’ll have to respond with a longer answer to keep the convo going. Open-ended questions usually start with “what” or “how” so she can’t answer just by saying yes or no. Rather than sticking with common questions asking about her day, dig a little deeper so you can learn more about your match.
I’m looking for a guy who is intelligent, funny, and spontaneous. If she doesn’t respond within a week, it could be a sign that she’s not into you. There are probably plenty of other people who would be excited to talk to you and are more worth your time. She’ll feel flattered that you noticed more than her appearance. Since commenting on her appearance might make it sound like you’re coming on a little too strong, mention what you admire about her personality from her profile. Even a few nice words will make her feel all warm and fuzzy and she’ll want to keep chatting to chase that feeling.
XXX could be anything, but love/dating life is usually the most fun. But instead sometimes you could just kickback and relax, as girls opened conversations with you. It’s a bit hard for her to add a funny reply, so she’ll likely just agree with you. My issue with this as a first Tinder message, is that it doesn’t invite her to send an extensive reply.